Growing Past Hurtful Words

For years I cried out to my father:

Why do you have to be so mean?
Why do you have to talk to me the way you do?
Why do you have to call me names?

I was always so preoccupied with HOW he talked to me, that I couldn’t hear WHAT he was talking to me about.

I was always so focused upon being hurt. I was always so focused on ‘why he couldn’t be a father like in the movies, instead of grasping the GOLD HE WAS TRYING TO GIVE ME.

Now that he is gone, I look back and realize- how much I love him for telling me the TRUTH, regardless of HOW he said it.

How he said it, wasn’t the issue.

The issue was my performance, my way of doing things. He was always telling me:

That’s not the right way of doing it!


Because my way of doing things was always the quickest and easiest way of doing things. And I always thought myself so smart for being able to think of an easier and quicker way so that I could get back to the pleasures of life, instead of the DUTIES OF LIFE- WORKING HARD.

At the time I didn’t understand- my easier way- did nothing but cheapen my character. My faster way- only under minded THE QUALITY OF THE WORK OR TASK. By selecting the easier way, I was proclaiming MY LAZINESS, MY LACK OF WILL POWER, and my lack of COMMITMENT. I wasn’t worried about PRECISION, being accurate, or perfection… I was worried about getting the job done as fast as possible so that I could return to the pleasures of life….to FEELING GOOD, instead of understanding what GOOD was.

Today, I am grateful for every lesson of life he took time to share with me. For every day I was able to work alongside him- REGARDLESS OF HOW HE SPOKE TO ME.

If you find yourself being hurt by someone’s words, ask yourself the following:

Do I believe this person really loves me?
Do they have my best interest at heart?
Is their foundation God? Truth? Honesty? Not stealing? Working hard?

IF you know in your heart they really love you, then do your absolute best to NOT BE OFFENDED AND HURT. Examine what they are saying, and understand you are the one out of alignment.

The way they say things will soon be forgotten, but the lessons they are trying to teach you will last you a lifetime. A rich treasure that will bless you time and time again.

Talk to me however you’d like, but tell me the Truth. Correct me if I am wrong. Yell at me, curse at me, I don’t care.. I am past that.. Remaining hurt and offended DOES ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO HELP ME.

What I value is Truth, I have no time to be hurt or offended. My time is for growing, learning, building, not wasting away in tears and asking ‘why couldn’t things be different.’ Speak to me harshly if I need it, I will respect you for it. I will shake your hand and thank you.

God bless~

Published by Benmadley777

My aim is to help others make sense of their own lives, by sharing the failures and misfortunes of mine. Misfortune and failure lead a man to the unmistakable clarity of his deception- That there is no need, nor room for God, because he himself is self sufficient, well educated, rich and capable. The more the man stays his ground, holding fast to his position- the more suffering he shall bring into his life. Suffering is the ground upon which elimination of the false occurs and perception of the Truth begins. After enough time is spent courting Misery, Pain, Humiliation, Slavery, Emptiness, one seeks to stop the bleeding. Some men prefer to bleed their way to death rather than admit their ignorance; that their way will never work. While other men, surrender, which is the beginning of knowledge. By surrendering the man does not fall, he rises and steps foot upon the path of Eternal Wisdom and Truth. It is the path that leads to Eternal Life- the pursuit of knowledge, is the pursuit of Almighty God- Man's Creator. *If you have questions, concerns, need direction, prayer, you may email me.* I do not charge for what Almighty God has given me freely.

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