The Haunting Of My Past

I have failed God so many times the failures haunt me. They spring up into the forefront of my mind without notice. I cringe as I momentarily relive the agony of my bad decisions. I find myself shouting expletives, in disbelief of the crudeness of which my guilt offends me.

Why? Why? Why? I ask as I hold fast onto the DEAD weight of my errors. I have a DEATH grip, that my fingers won’t release from. I listen attentively, to the defining words my failures tell me I am. I worry about the countless number of people I’ve let down. I’m stalled DEAD in the water with no oars. I cannot move.

Until I remember, it is not my failures that define me, it is God, his Word, and belief in his son Jesus Christ that do. That belief silences all voices claiming I am who they want me to be.  A smile overtakes me, because I stand now firm on the shore. Raised up from the water with a supernatural revival so potent, nothing can hold me down. I’ve been given eternal LIFE. I have been forgiven. I am now more ALIVE than ever. I recall to mind, all the times he has intervened for my sake, and I know without a doubt he loves me. I feel the grace of the sun warming my face.  I release the dead weight of lies that my fingers wouldn’t let go of and I reach for his Word as our Heavenly Father reaches for your heart.

Do your failures haunt you? Let them go. Surrender them to God. Claim victory over them and know your forgiven. Don’t doubt your forgiveness. Believe it with your heart. Know without a shadow of a doubt, that’s why Jesus laid down his life. Next time your faced with a disastrous decision, don’t even entertain it. Reject it. Stand firm on the shoreline, victorious. Let the warmth of his love and might strengthen you. Keep in mind every right decision you make, equals blessing for you and yours, so bless them daily through your faithful determination. Never give up.

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